Less Stress More Calm

5 Things You Must Do Before Becoming Happy

1.       It is essential for you to make a conscious decision to be happy. Make that decision today! To be truly happy, accept and love yourself for whom you truly are. If you do not love and accept yourself, you will project your own insecurities and judgmental behaviour on others. When you choose to love and accept yourself, you will immediately begin to love and accept others.     

2.       Wake up each day and decide right then to be happy. If you run around stressed after crawling out of bed and avoid your inner thoughts, you will allow negativity and worries to seep in and rule your day. Take time to relax each morning and decide that today will be a day stuffed with happy thoughts!  This is a golden rule to living each and every day with happiness in your heart.  I do it every day.

3.       Realize that your worries, anxieties and negative judgments are not your core self. They come from societies programming, past conditioning and your ego’s continuous fear and insecurities. Within your core self is a deep pool of happiness. You may use this pool of happiness at anytime to live a truly wonderful life.    

4.       Make happiness your number one goal in life. It isn’t money, a beautiful body, retirement, or any so called success factor that should be your ultimate goal in life.  Happiness should be your goal and it is available to you right now! You can step out the door in the next few minutes and open yourself to your inner happiness. It is right there! If being happy is not your ultimate goal then you will never be genuinely happy. It took me hundreds of books, blogs, talks and years to finally come to this simple conclusion. My goal is to be happy.

5.       Understand that once you have the basic needs of shelter, food, and love, you already have the authentic fundamentals for living a happy life. If you think you need all the possessions that society makes you believe you need, than happiness will forever be out of your reach.  You will always want something, newer, faster or shinier, and you will never be genuinely happy with what you have. You can choose to be happy right now with the basic needs of life. Happiness is inside and can be released anytime you desire.  Sounds simple, but happiness really is a choice. Make that choice right now!

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How To Be Happy

Where does happiness come from?

From my many years of observations and readings, most people believe that happiness comes from an external source.  External sources of happiness may be winning the lottery, becoming thin, retiring, getting married or a long planned vacation. Retiring is a big one. People are programmed by society to believe that retirement is when we ``deserve`` to be happiness. The startling reality is that we all carry a core of happiness within right now.  Unfortunately most of us allow the conditioning of life to weigh heavily upon us. Thus our lifelong conditions make us continuously grasp at pockets of happiness like we are entitled to happiness only during special occasions.  Nothing can be further from the truth.  We are all entitled to happiness and have the ability to feel happy at all times.

How can I feel happy all the time?

Having read more than a dozen books on the subject of happiness I have come to two major conclusions. First of all our main goal in life is to be happy.  If you can think of a better goal in life or a more important one, please let me know. Secondly, happiness is a choice, either we choose to be happy or not. It is an inner attitude. It is a core part of us waiting to be let out at all times. Acts of happiness can be as simple as going outside looking up at the sky or picking up a flower. It isn’t the size of the gesture that is important, it is the willingness for you to allow happiness to become an integral part of your life every day. 

So the choice truly resides in you. You can get up each morning with the intention of living a happy life or not. One last thing. Allowing more love in your world is also just as important.  Happiness and love go hand in hand.

They are both waiting to be let out right now.   What is stopping you?   

How To Become Very Happy Right Now

After having read a couple of hundred self help books over the last 15 years I’ve come to the conclusion that being happy is a choice. Either we chose to be happy or we don’t. It’s that simple! We are all seeking happiness and we all have the ability to be happy in our central core. Our pure unconditioned inside self is happiness. And that happiness can be let out right now!

Why aren’t we happy? We aren’t happy because we are conditioned over the years to pay attention to many useless thoughts and worries from the outside world, that creates our inner troubled world.  All our worries, anger, frustrations come from the world outside of our mind and heart. We are too fat. We don’t have enough money. We hate our jobs. We are conditioned to worry about these things and also inflict terrible self judgement upon ourselves because we aren’t measuring up to someone else’s standards. And with all this negative bombardment of thoughts we might have times of joy but never true contentment. What is stopping you from taking a nice walk outside right now? Only your thoughts.

You do have a core of happiness inside of you waiting to burst out. The only thing you have to do is let it out.  Let go of judging yourself, let go of guilt and tell yourself you deserve to be happy right now. Don’t you deserve to be happy right now? Don’t you deserve to be happy for the rest of your life?  

Just let yourself be happy right now. Just try it for a minute. Tomorrow morning get up and chose to be happy. Creating that choice in the morning will start you off to a happy day. Each happy day leads to a happy life.

You can read a million books, try to lose weight, count your pennies, change jobs and continue to find the ultimate solution to happiness.   Or you can recognize that you have the potential to be happy right now.  It has been in your heart all this time! You are the key to your own happiness! You can be happy right now.        

There Is No Excuse For Not Living The Dream

Each one of us related to a human who has done miraculous feats. Whether it be building the pyramids, walking on the moon or even living in caves and hunting for meat in the wild. There is no excuse for not living your dream. You can stop spending, eating or whatever stupid habit you have started and believe you can’t stop. 

Just so happens that in this day and age most of us pathetically prefer to wimp out. We don’t even make the first attempt to change our life never mind follow our dreams. We watch television, surf the net, raid the fridge or find a million pitiful distractions to fill some kind of imaginary void in our mundane lives.

I don’t buy it for one second that we can’t make life changes right now. If we as humans had survived in the wilderness all those centuries and performed all those feats, then why can’t we put down that extra piece of fucking pizza? Or not even order it in the first place. People in this day and ages have gotten lazy, undisciplined, whiny and seem to find the most absurd justifications for avoiding success.

There are no excuses. And if you are thinking of one right now then keep living your cookie cutter, depressing life. No one cares.

You can stand up right now and make a pledge to yourself that you will live your dream. You can devote at least thirty minutes a day to plan or execute the life you dream about. There are no excuses. If you have found one then you are a fooling yourself again.

The choice is 100% clear. There are no more excuses.  You have run out.

Do it.   

A Simple Strategy To Start Meditating Right Now

Here is a simple strategy to begin meditating tomorrow morning. Meditation isn’t some mystical journey whereas you are required to become a Zen or Buddhist master. Meditation is simply staying in one place quietly, eventually learning to be in the present moment until it becomes natural. 

Living in the present moment is the beginning to ending the mindless clatter and worries that are constantly bombarding you. Meditation teaches you to ignore self destructive thoughts and become at peace with ones selves, warts and all.

My meditation techniques are based on the practices of Pema Chodron . 

Find a quiet room away from your bedroom. Sit upright, hands on lap, legs crossed and focus on a spot 4 to 5 feet in front of you.  Concentrate on your outer breath as a way of focusing the mind. When a thought arises, label it as “thinking” and go back to concentrating on your outer breath.  Let your thoughts go over and over again by labeling them as thinking. Continue to relax and allow whatever thoughts to arise without labeling them good or bad. Return to your outer breath. 

Try to perform this exercise 15 minutes a day to start. After a while you will notice that you can return to the present moment much easier. This is one of the best ways to reduce the stress caused by over thinking and worrying.

You are the master of your life.   

How To Get Your Ass Seriously Kicked

 

I’ve thought about kicking peoples asses that use my website. I’d change it to give them the option for a good ass kicking. I would see if they are tracking and paying attention to their goals. If they  weren’t? BAM! Ass kicking!

Most people hire life coaches to get their ass kicked. Didn’t follow up on that goal? You guessed it. BOOM! So many people fail at reaching their goals because they don’t have someone ready to boot them in the butt.  I think the ass kicking business would be very lucrative for me. But it would cost a pretty penny (for you my friend) and be time consuming.

Top ten reasons people need a good ass kicking:

•  Constantly dream about making life changes but never lift a finger.
•  Moaning and complaining how the world is against them.
•  Sit in front of the TV or as I call it, “meaningless choices in a box”.
•  Keep talking about their friend’s new stuff.
•  Follow the latest gossip on the celebrities.
•  Allow a stream of insignificant worries to nag them day after day.
•  Stuff their faces thinking that Big Mac will make them feel better.
•  Afraid to leave the safety of their cubicles and venture out in the world.
•  Follow the nice path their parents laid out for them.
•  Believe that the government and other institutions (banking) have their best interests in mind.

Ready to bend over? I am.